You finally realize how much of a d*** and a**hole you have been this whole time after almost a year...
don't you wish time travel was possible?
I've done something absolutely wrong and terrible to a couple of people, almost to the point of School Days level bad(as someone pointed out). I don't want to be that guy one bit. Among those people is someone very special to me that I've just now fully realized how wrongly I've mistreated. it was slowly coming to me but the rest hit me like truck and i never fully apologized, so badly and wrongly in fact i don't know how i was so blind to not see it originally, and it took a very recent nightmare (among others)for it to finally click (and it must explain why those people do what they do around me).
So here's my question
how do i give my most sincerest and deepest apology to them without sorta, ya know... bringing up the past and faults and making the encounter once again awkward. Especially to the one person. I mean, it seems that its all in the past now, and things have gotten better between us, and i know they said that there's nothing to apologize for but this is something different, something during the fallout. After waking up from that horrid thing of torture called a nightmare, it makes me sick to my stomach knowing that because of my actions, these select people now very much dislike me and now will probably never think the same about me again. When i do tell this person in particular eventually, i hope that it is absolutely in the best way possible from the most absolutely sincerest bottom depths of my soul that i am absolutely sorry for doing this and wish i would've known a lot sooner not to do it. What i did was more than wrong, its absolutely disgraceful, I'm just wondering why they wanted to talk to me in the first place again after long time period during fallout. They already know my feelings, and like a searing burn scar, wont fully go away ever. Realistically, nothing much will come out of this, but i want this to be done right, and in person sometime (no matter how scared i am(i know i was absolutely nervous and terrified when i saw them again for the first time in forever)), hoping that i can maybe earn back a little of what shattered respect and like they once had of me. If i can somehow earn even the tiniest of redemption, ill be that much closer to getting my mind level again, probably not as jubilant as in the hay days, but level.
(I rambled a bit) Any ideas?